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Joke 21
On their first night together, newlywed Banta and his wife Preeto go to change.
Preeto comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. Banta
says, "My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe." The beautiful
Preeto opens her robe, and he is astonished. "Oh, oh, aaaahhh," he exclaims, "My
God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture."
Puzzled she asks, "My picture?"
Banta answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart
forever".
Preeto smiles and he takes her picture, and then Banta heads into the bathroom
to shower. He comes out wearing his robe.
Preeto asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now."
Banta opens his robe and Preeto exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture".
Banta beams and asks "why?"
Preeto answers, "So I can get it enlarged!"
Joke 22
Banta Singh: "Yaar Santa, last year the name-plate outside your house read Santa
Singh, B.A. This year it reads Santa Singh, M.A.When did you finish your Masters
Degree?"
Santa Singh: "You don't understand. Last year my wife died, I put B.A. to
indicate Bachelor Again. Then I took a second wife, So M.A. is Married Again."
Joke 23
Help.... Titanic is sinking....
Everyone on the ship are shouting, crying, running or praying to god...
Just then a Italian asks the nearby Sardarji in the ship.
Italian : How far is land, from here?
Sardarji : Two miles ..
Italian : Only two miles, Then why are these fools making noise. I have got the
experience of swimming even more.
The Italian jumps off the ship into the sea and comes up to the layer to ask
something again.
Italian : Just tell me which side, land is two miles from here?
Sardarji : Downwards ...
Joke 24
4 men - a Marathi, Bengali, Gujarati and our Santa were being interviewed for a
top job.
With nothing to choose between them, the President told them over dinner that
the decisive test would be carried out the following morning, with each
candidate being asked the same question and the best answer would get them the
job.
The next morning, first up was the Marathi.
"Here's your question," said the President, "What's the fastest thing in the
world?"
Without hesitation, he replied "A thought, because it takes no time at all."
"Very good answer," said the President.
Next up was the Gujarati, "What's the fastest thing in the world?" asked the
president. "A blink," replied the Gujju almost instantaneously, "Cos you don't
think about a blink. It's a reflex."
"Good answer," replied the president.
Next was the Bengali, "What's the fastest thing in the world?" asked the
president.
The Bengali thought for a moment, "Electricity, because you can flip a switch
and 20 miles away a light will go on immediately."
"That's a great answer," replied the president.
Finally, it was our Santa's turn. "What's the fastest thing in the world?" asked
the president.
Scratching his head Santa replied: "Diarrhea, because last night after dinner I
was lying on my bed when I got these awful stomach pains and before I could
think, blink or turn on the light....."
Joke 25
Santa Singh and Banta Singh were discussing how they would like to die. Santa
said, "When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his
sleep. I don't want to die screaming like some of his friends, who also died at
the same time."
Banta asked, "How did his friends die screaming while your grandfather died
sleeping peacefully?"
Santa Singh replied, "His friends were the passengers in the car he was
driving."
Joke 26
The Sardarni asked her lover, Santa Singh were out on a romantic evening. She
said to him, "Santa Darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?" "Sure"
replied Santa "What's your phone number?"
Joke 27
Santa Singh was brought to court on charges of drunken driving. Just before the
trial there was a commotion in the gallery. The judge pounded the gravel on his
table and shouted, "Order! Order!" Santa responded immediately, "Thank you ,
your honor! I'll have a scotch and soda."
Joke 28
A sardar had arrived early at the stadium for the first cricket game of the
series between local rival teams only to realize that he had left his ticket at
home. Not wanting to miss any of the first inning, he went to the ticket booth
and got in a long line for another seat.After an hour's wait he was just a few
feet from the booth when a voice called out, "Hey, Balbir!" He looked up,
stepped out of line and tried to find the owner of the voice-with no
success.Then he realized he had lost his place in the line, and had to go back
to the end of the line and wait all over again.After he had purchased his
ticket, he was thirsty, so he went to buy a coke. The line at the concession
stand was also very long. But since the game hadn't started he decided to wait.
Just as he got to the window, a voice called out"Hey, Balbir!" Again He tried to
find the voice and got out of line as he wandered looking for the owner of the
voice. But no luck. He was very upset as he got back in line for his coke.
Finally he had his coke and took his seat eager for the game to begin. As he
waited for the first ball, he heard the voice calling, "Hey, Balbir!" once more.
Furious, He stood up and yelled at the top of his lungs,"My name isn't Balbir!"
Joke 29
Cousin Banta
Jallandhar
Dear Banta,
I'm writing this real slow because I know you can't read very fast. We don't
live where we did when you left. We read in the paper that most accidents happen
within 10 miles of home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you our new
address cause the last family that lived here took the house numbers with them
so they wouldn't have to change their address. This place has a washing machine.
The first day mama put four shirts in, pulled the chain and we have not seen
them since. It's only rained here twice this week. Three days the first time and
four days the second time. I know its cold where you are so we're sending you a
coat. Ma said it would be too heavy to mail with them buttons on it, so we cut
them off and put them in the pockets. We got a letter from the funeral home.
They said if we don't make the last payment on grandma's funeral bill, up she
comes! My sister had a baby this morning. I haven't heard whether it's a boy or
a girl, so I don't know if I'm an uncle or an aunt. Uncle Balbir fell in the big
whiskey vat. When they tried to pull him out, he fought them off, so he drowned.
We cremated him and he burned for three days.
Cousin Santa
Ludhiana.
P.S. : I was planning to enclose the money that I owe you with this envelope,
but I had already sealed this by then.
Joke 30
'Take me to the 10th floor,' said Banta Singh as he entered the lift of a high
rise building. When the lift reached its destination, the liftman (another
Sardar) opened its gates and said, 'The 10th floor, beta.' 'Why did you call me
beta?' demanded Banta Singh. 'I am not your son.' 'I called you beta because I
brought you up,' replied the liftman
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