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Joke 11
One great day in Bombay, a couple were on a honeymoon tour. They saw one
sardarji in front of a hospital (Breach Candy) was trying to fill some form. So
the couple enquired eagerly "What are you doing ?" Sardarji replied that I had a
baby and I am filling the birth certificate form. The couple as per schedule,
took the Bombay to Delhi Flight for their next destination. On the next day,
they find the same Sardarji, in front of Lal Qilla in Delhi filling the same
form. So once again young couple curiously asked - "What are you doing here?"
Sardarji once again replied I had a baby and I am filling the birth certificate
form. The couple said but sardarji yesterday you were in Bombay filling the same
form, how come you're in Delhi? Sardarji cooly replied It is written here -
"FILL IN CAPITALS"
Joke 12
English man asks Sardar : "Hello, How do you do?"
Sardar : I don't know about you but we remove underwear and do!!
Joke 13
Once Manjeet Kaur - Wife of Santa went for swimming wearing BRA & PANTY. Trainer
at the pool said madam here two peice costume is not allowed. Manjeet,"So which
one do I remove ?"
Joke 14
One very young & handsome sardar was tavelling by train with two-three small
kids in his tow. Opposite to him was a pretty girl sitting who was feeling a bit
uneasy on seeing the young sardar with a couple of kids & no wife. After some
time she could not resist & asked the sardar fellow as to when did he get
married & where is his wife. Sardar was taken aback & said, What, me married ?
Oh No. I'm only 21 & just finished my college.
Then who are these kids, the girl enquired.
Oh These, actually I'm a Condom sales man & these are customer complaints.
Joke 15
A Sardarni holding a baby walks into a drug store and asks a clerk if she can
use the store's free baby scale.
'Sorry, ma'am,' says the clerk. 'Our baby scale is out for repairs. But we can
figure the baby's weight if we weigh mother and baby together on the adult
scale, and then weigh the mother alone, and subtract the second number from the
first.'
'Oh, that won't work,' says the Sardarnee.
'Why not?' asks the clerk.
'Because,' says the Sardarnee, 'I'm not the mother -- I'm just the aunt.'
Joke 16
One fine morning a sardar goes for a drive in his car. He is enjoying his drive
when suddenly he sees another sardarji in the middle of a field rowing a boat.
Puzzled he stops the car and standing at the edge of the road screams, "what are
you doing rowing a boat in a field?".
The sardarji answers "it is an ocean of wheat and I am rowing a boat in the
ocean."
The sardar angrily says "it is because of sardars like you we have a bad name.
If only I knew to swim I would have come there and beaten you up".
Joke 17
A crow shits on a Sardar..Sardarni hands over a tissue paper to Sardarji.
Sardar says : "Now whose ass do I wipe, the crow has flown away."
Joke 18
Banta Singh rushed back angrily to the grocery shop from where he had
purchased a packet of butter a few minutes ago.
"Where is my free gift?" he shouted at the shopkeeper. "But Sir, there is no
free gift on the purchase of butter." The shopkeeper answered politely. "Don't
fool me," replied Banta, "it is clearly written on the packet of the butter
'Cholesterol free'".
Joke 19
Santa Singh needed some money desperately. Some one told him that if he goes and
prays at Gurudwara, Mosque, Church and a temple, that his prayers will surely be
answered. So Santa goes to a Gurudwara, and prays there. Then he goes to a
Mosque and prays there. Then he goes to a church and prays there. Then he goes
to a Shiv temple. The temple had a large Lord Shiva statue. Santa closes his
eyes, bows his head, joins his hands and says his prayer.
Santa: "Ho Jee tussee itne vadde ho. Itne mahan ho. Saannoo 100 rupayen chahiye.
Kirpa karo." The priest saw Santa praying. He wanted to help Santa, but knew
that a Sikh will never accept the money. So he drops a 100 rupee note, from
behind the statue, so that Santa can not see him. After Santa had said his
prayers, and opened his eyes. He saw the note and thought that god has listened
to his prayers. He takes the note and goes away.
However he is back again next day for money. Now the priest is really annoyed
with Santa. The Priest decides that he is not going to give any more money to
Santa. He changes the big Shivji statue with smaller one of Ganapathi that day.
Once again Santa goes to the prayer room. However he does not notice the
difference.
Santa closes his eyes, bows his head, joins his hands and says his prayer.
Santa: "Ho Jee tussee itne vadde ho. Itne mahan ho . Ajj to saannoo 50 rupayen
hi chahiye. Kirpa karo."
After that he slowly opens his eyes and does not find any money. Santa:"O papa
jee tussee itne vadde ho. Itne mahan ho. Asee 10 rupayen me hi kaam chala lenge.
Kirpa karo jee."
After that he slowly opens his eyes and does not find any money.
He slowly raises his head and now notices that small Ganapthi statue. He
carefully looks left and than right, and then slowly moves a bit forward near
the statue. Then he whispers to the statue: "Beta, Papa kitthe hai?!?!!"
Joke 20
About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the Sardars had to
leave Italy. Naturally there was a big uproar from the Sardar community. So the
Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate with a member of the Sardar
community. If the Sardar won, the Sardars could stay. If the Pope won, the
Sardars would leave.
The Sardars realized that they had no choice. So they picked a middle aged man
named Santa Singh to represent them. Santa Singh asked for one condition to be
added to the debate. To make it more interesting, the
debate was to be conducted using sign language and neither side would be allowed
to talk. The Pope agreed.
The day of the great debate came. Santa Singh and the Pope sat opposite each
other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three
fingers. Santa Singh looked back at him and raised one finger. The Pope waved
his fingers in a circle around his head. Santa Singh pointed to the ground where
he sat. The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Santa Singh pulled out
an apple.
The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good. The Sardars can
stay. "
An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking him what had
happened. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the
trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there was still
one God common to both our religions. Then I waved my finger around me to show
him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground and
showing that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to
show that God absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of
original sin. He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"
Meanwhile, the Sardar community had crowded around Santa Singh. "What happened
?" they asked. "Well", said Santa Singh, "First he said to me that the Sardars
had three days to get out of here. I told him that not one of us was leaving.
Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of Sardars. I let him know
that we were staying right here."
"And then?", asked the crowd.
"I don't know," said Santa Singh, "He took out his lunch and I took out mine".
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